Swisscheese.exe

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Apparently, there is a 30-second video clip that floats around the dark bowels of the internet. What makes this even worse is that the video has infiltrated a children's television show. This video has also been seen by millions of American children. After an investigation, scientists have proven that this video can lower the IQ of the viewer if it is seen enough times. The video goes as follows:

First, a shot of what appears to be an 18th century painting of a sailor flashes onto the screen. The voices of possessed children seem to salute the man in the painting. His lips appear to be photorealistic. After revealing that the has hearing problems, the children are forced to repeat themselves. Then, the shot moves to what appears to be a mangled piece of Swiss cheese dancing. The piece of Swiss cheese keeps changing its appearance as the possessed children shout the name of the piece of Swiss cheese. I am not revealing the name to keep you safe, as it is undoubtedly the name of a demon. During this period, it is also revealed that the Swiss cheese lives near the site of an old nuclear test facility, in what appears to be a mutated piece of fruit. The strange properties of the Swiss cheese man are also revealed. Finally, the Swiss cheese man returns to his normal form. He then performs a song using his deformed nose as an instrument. The video abruptly ends when a series of bubbles covers the screen.

Whatever you do, DO NOT watch this video! Your IQ will be at risk!

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