The Haunting of Moneybaggs Manor

Ugustus Moneybaggs was a rich asshole. He lived in a big ol' family mansion in Kentucky. He only cared about 3 things: himself, money, and Justin Beiber. His net worth was 5 gogalizilan dollars.

Now, his family house was built on an ancient indian burial ground or something, so it was haunted as balls. None of his family new this. Not his papa, not his grandpapa, not his greatgrandpapa, or even his greatgreatgrandpapa (his greatgreatgreatgrandpapa, on the other hand, he built it on purpose, because he was a racist bastard.) Ugustus went into his garden to antagonize his gardener, Philipe. "Hey Philipe, your poor so u have to work on my garden!" Yelled Moneybaggs, as he cackled like a rich douchebag. "Man, fuck you essae." Said Philipe, as he continued doing his job like the hardworking man he is. "You have to work for me to feed your family!" said Ugustus. Ugustus then started to through down pennies and telling Philipe to pick them up, but he was ignored.

Moneybaggs went into his smokin room to smoke his artisanal Cuban cigar, his lamp started flying and screaming "REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" really loud. He ignored it and went to the homeless shelter to laugh at the hobos, ya know, like an absolute fucking dickhead.

Moneybaggs then got his chef to make him a ham. Suddenly, the ham exploded. He wrote it off as an assasination attempt and had his bodyguards execute his chef. He then watched tv, and it started to leak hyperrealalistic blood. But he ignored it like a dumbass.

Hours later, he went to bed. But then, a spoopy ghost came out of the closet. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO UGUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSTUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS" said the ghostie. "what do u want" .screamed the frighined gogalizianare. "I'm here to drag you to hell where you belong" "but what did i do" "are you fucking Stupid" yelled the dead dude. "You kill the homeless and poor for fun, you demean everyone else, and u stan Justin Bieber!" "how much moolah to make this go away" said Moneybaggs. "What, i dont need that shit, you cant pay ur way out of going to hell dumbass!" Said the ghost. Then, hands came out under the bed, and dragged Ugustus to hell.

Moral of the story: don't be a rich douchebag

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