The Midi File in the Email Attachment Cliche

One day I was in the attic looking around for things to sell at a pawn shop. Everything was dusty and cluttered, boxes labeled "memories" and "old games." I was walking and then I tripped on a large object, I looked behind myself and saw my old computer. I forgot all about the computer since I hadn't played it since I was nine. My parents got it for me as a present, I had gotten into it, but I got bored and it just sat on the counter until my parents probably put it in here. I already have a nice laptop, but I decided to take the computer to my room and tried to boot it up. Sadly, it didn't boot. I expected it, it was a Windows 98, it probably got dust in its mainframe or something.

I was about to push it to the side when I noticed a flashdrive which is kind of odd because I looked up the year flashdrives were invented and apparently they weren't out to the public yet in 1998. I took out the flashdrive and put it in my laptop. "Downloading file 1/68." it took about an hour but it finally finished downloading. Three applications appeared on my desktop, the microsoft email service, half life, and a weird pinball game. I clicked the microsoft email application and it already had a email signed into it.

Woah, this was my ancient email address, there were emails from my aunt and uncle from a decade ago, even longer ago than that! I had a weird email, though. It was named "You gotta listen to this man!" I clicked it because I really like music, it's dope. The link sent me to a private youtube video, but then I signed in and it said I could watch. I put in my headphones and closed my eyes, ready to listen. It was a midi of Justin Beiber. I thought it was a prank and I laughed, but I remembered something. This email was from 1998, so Justin Beiber wasn't alive. How did he send this link? I was super freaked out so I got out of the browser. Just then I got an email, "YOU LIKE MIDI?" I replied, "How did you do that, Justin Beiber wasn't alive yet!" The person replied, "YOU LIKE MIDI? LOOK AT DESKTOP NOW." I listened to the man with poor grammar and looked on my desktop. Oh... my... God...

Bonzi buddy was now on my desktop and he was singing! My ears started bleeding hyper-realistically! I cried and an error message popped up, "TURNING TO MAXIMUM VOLUME." OH MY GOD BONZI BUDDY STARTED SINGING ROW ROW ROW YOUR BOAT. I grabbed a torch and set my laptop on fire, finally it was gone. It stopped, but now I had to buy a new laptop.

I guess the lesson here is fire is always the answer.

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