The Television Death Collection

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Just read, FOOL!

Drake Kills Josh

One day Drake was pissed off at Walter so he stole Megan's obo and shoved it up Walter's ass.

Megan found out and tried to kill Drake but was grabbed by Josh's human magnet and then Drake was like "Why did you do that I wanted to fight her!"

So Drake and Josh fight to the death and Drake killed Josh and he was wearing Josh's head as an over-sized turban.


One day the Rammstein keyboardist came up to Till their singer and was all like "Why do I die in all the music videos?"

So Till be like "Because you need to shut up."

So then the keyboardist shoved his keyboard up Till's ass and then the other band members run over the keyboardist with the truck from Benzin but he wasn't really run over because the truck was fake so they hit him with a deathstick and Till had problems shitting ever since.

King of the Dead

One day Hank went into Bobby's room with a chainsaw, turned it on and shoved it up Bobby's ass and said, "This is your punishment for breathing in air that wasn't being shared with propane, son."

Hank then walked into the kitchen and he was crushed by a giant boggle set that mysteriously fell from the sky.

Peggy was like, "It's a gift from the boggle gods!" and then Dale walked in and shot the boggle set with an RPG but he meant to shoot peggy and his aim was bad so Peggy killed him and then Boomhauer came up behind Peggy and snapped her neck and then Bill killed Boomhauer by sitting on him and then Kahn killed Bill with an axe, threw Connie out the window, threw Minh into the garbage chute and drove Lucky into the lake and married Luanne until Luanne killed him and John Redcorn came up and killed Luanne with a rock and then the rock killed John Redcorn in his sleep.


One day, Carly was doing iCarly when suddenly Gibby walked in and killed Freddy and raped Carly and Sam with his dog and then Spencer came in and killed Gibby with an anti-Gibby spray and then Carly and Sam got exposed to Rammstein's new hypnotic song about Till getting a keyboard shoved up his ass and it caused them to kill each other.

After that Spencer went to Freddy's mom's house and raped her and then she killed him with her annoying lectures and then Lubert came up and was like, "Hey look neighbor I finally got rid of my wor-oh God." Lubert then picked up a machine gun and shot Freddy's mom to death and then Lubert was crushed by the apartment falling down on him and everyone in the apartment died.

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