Who was Skeleton?
Authors Note: I actually did research for this pasta. Why? I don't have a life. Enjoy.
LOLHUMANS was a fairly normal man. Besides the fact that he laughed out loud at everybody he met. He also was part of the occult for Curious George, the all-knowing divine Lord of the universe. One merrily day, he went about Trollpasta Town looking for some babes. He dashed as fast as he could to a crowed of nearby humans and he went ballistic. "HAHAHAHAHAHA LOOK AT ALL OF THESE HUMANS!!!" he screamed in the middle of a line for a hot dog stand. Everyone stared at the slightly deranged man, but then quickly refocused their attention to the hooded man with a huge smile selling hot dogs.
After the quick breakfast of Banana O's (He has a craving for them) bought from the stand, he giggled to himself thinking about more humans. Suddenly he saw her. The perfect woman. She had the smile of an angel, hair made of rich coal (If that's a thing). Eyes that sparkled like the moon. It's his daughter of course. LOLHUMANS ran over to her, laughing of course. He then banned her for being so ugly. She cried hyper-realistic tears.
The next morning, LOLHUMANS had a bad feeling. He thought it was just a glitch so he ignored it... bad choice. He got up and jumped out the window (who the fuck has time for stairs). He then entered his house through another window (who the fuck has time for doors). In the kitchen he was cooking something for his pet monkey (his daughter of course). "Bananas again?" she asked. "Yes you fucking ugly slut. Eat your fucking bananas I may or may not have taken a big corny shit on." LOLHUMANS and LOLDAUGHTERS exited through the window together, doing a triple barrel roll and landing in perfect form. Sadly they didn't realize the stove was still on.
LOLHUMANS returned from his trip to the local bar and saw his house was on fire. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he screamed like a little pussy. He ran inside the melting window and ran over to his closet to look for any old, wet tissues he could use to put the fire out. Being inside the small space of the closet made him suffocate on all the smoke. And smell of fish. He blacked out and lost 13 Doge Coins.
LOLHUMANS had a short dream. Was it a wet dream? Idk. LOLHUMANS looked around in his dream. "Ugh, where am I?" The smell of flaming jellyfish jelly lingered in the air. "Is anyone there?" LOLHUMANS was starting to get paranoid. "It is I, your mighty overlord." "GEORGE? IS THAT YOU? :D" "No, fool. I am the being known as EVIL PATRIXXX." "Who?" "Fool, look to either side of the page." "Do you have any idea where I am?" "Yes, human" (LOLHUMANS giggled a bit) "You are dead. You suffocated in your closet like a retard. But I will give you the chance to live." "Yes! I will do anything to live!" "Very well. You shall keep your virginity forever and be immortal." "Aw shi-" LOLHUMANS woke up.
He knew he was still in his closet even though it was pitch black, because it still smelled like fish. He got up and noticed he was a lot lighter. He walked over to his pool and stared at his reflection. "wat the fak." he exclaimed out loud. He was a skeleton. His jaw then literally dropped. "I shall now be known as LOLSKELETONS!" He went back to town, and saw a poster for the Skeletons of Anarchy gang. He joined it soon after. He called LOLDAUGHTERS to tell her the news.
Meanwhile, you were making out with ur honey wen her phone rigns. U anser it n the vioce is "wut r u doing wit my daughter?" U tell ur girl n she say "my dad is ded". WHO WAS-- Oh wait, it was LOLSKELETONS.
The other bikers of the gang didn't like LOLSKELETONS that much. He was always laughing at them for no apparent reason. They took his bike away and gave him an old car. When he got in, he wasn't yet used to his new skeleton hot bod, so he couldn't open the window to get out. (How did he get in? Idk.) He just sighed and drove down the road to pick up chicks. He saw a tall skinny man with no face and had tentacles coming out of him. "Mmmm look at dat ass on this bby." he said to himself, getting boned. (Punny indeed.) The tall man stuck his thumb out to signal he wanted to get picked up. LOLSKELETONS stopped a few yards in front of him, because he likes to be a dick. When the man went up and opened the door. LOLSKELETONS jumped out at him. "Ayyyy I'm free!" LOLSKELETONS then ran away, never to be seen again.
Afterstory
There have been reports of a spooki skeleton running around the vicinity of Trollpasta Town, setting everyone's houses on fire if they aren't part of the Curious George Occult. Recently, there have more reports of a skeleton banning people on Trollpasta wiki, possibly under the influence of EVIL PATRIXXX. Lock your waifus and bananas in your closets, because he--no, IT, has an apparent fear of closets. Oh also, YOU'RE NEXT. Thanks for reading.
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