Yakuza 7 prototype
AUTHOR NOTE: THIS PASTA CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE YAKUZA GAMES, THOUGH IF YOU COULDN'T FIGURE THAT OUT THEN WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO READ THIS
so u may be wondering why u cant play as kiryu in yakuza 7. some may theorise that its because he faked his deth in yakuza 6, but actualy the truth is more sinister than u could ever imagine.
to start off my storey, i am an uber sexy leet hackker who is a member of anonymous. i regularly talk to the leader in our super secret meetings where we discus how to be scary and relevant. im also a huge fan of the yakuza games, much like evreyone else.
in a super secret anonymous meeting, i sugested we should leak stuff relating to yakuza 8. everyone was on boardd with it.
so we hackd into segas servers in search of yakuza 8 stuff. however, we came across a folder labeleed "yakuza 7 prototype DO NOT OPEN" so we downloaded it and decided to have a lil looksie.
however, my mummy called me down for diner, so i had to let the others look at it themeselvs.
after my yummy yummy tater tots, i went bak to my computer only to discovr that the meeting had ended. i asked my hacker frends about what they found in the prototype and they said "dont open it srsly dont do it plz plz"
but i love yakuza so i opend it, and started a nu game. the intro cutsene was kiryu performing satanic rituals, before looking straight at me and teling me to kill myself. then kiryu walkd out of his house before removing his pants and pissing so hard that he shot up 2km into the sky.
this may have been the final part of his demonic ritual, as when he finished pissing, a massive evil patrixxx arose from the beautiful pacific ocean and the two looked each other in there eyes.
kiryu then flew towards evil patrixxx, and they became one, to form the patrixxx of dojima (picture is here)
he then again looked strait at me and proceeded to charge towards the camera, and i was so scared that i closed the game and deleted it off my hard drive.
so i theorised tyhat the reason u cant play as kiryu in yakuza 7 is actualy because sega was too scared to let anyone be in control of such a powerful being. he may have hided the evil patrixxx side of him in the real yakuza 7, but deep down its still inside him.
Written by Nambona890
Content is available under CC BY-SA
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