My Spooky Day Off

THIS MORNING I, A PROUD 21 YEAR OLD MALE, GOT UP AND MADE MYSELF BREAKFAST, IT WAS MILK SOLIDS IN MILK. I HAD JUST FINISHED THANKING MR SKELTAL AND DECIDED TO GO FOR A WALK IN MY 100% DIRTY LINEN ROBE. I CAUGHT UP WITH SOME OF MY FRIENDS AT THE LOCAL PARK AND HAD A GOOD LAUGH WITH THEM (THEY WERE JUST BEHIND THE BUSHES, LAUGHING TOO).

MY FRIENDS HAD TO LEAVE SUDDENLY SO I TOOK A WET POO IN THE BUSHES, JUST OVER BEHIND THE ABANDONDED FACTORY. MY BONES WERE REALLY STRONK SO I WAS ABLE TO PUSH OUT THE POO REALLY QUICK USING MY INTESTINAL BONES, WHICH WAS COOL.

I WAS WIPING MY BUTT WITH MY ROBE WHEN I NOTICED THERE WAS SOMETHING RISING FROM MY POO. IT WAS INVISIBLE, YET I COULD SEE IT! IT HAD THE WARM PRESENCE OF LIFE, BUT LEFT THE FOUL STENCH OF DEATH IN ITS PATH. THAT COULD ONLY MEAN ONE THING - GHOST! OMG!

I BURNT THE HAUNTED POO TO THE GROUND AND RAN AWAY SCREAMING. I TOLD MY FRIENDS IN THE BUSHES NEXT DOOR AND THEY HAD A GOOD LAUGH WITH ME (AGAIN, THEY WERE JUST OUT OF FRAME).

THEN I TOOK A PEE ON THE GROUND INSIDE THE ABANDONED FACTORY. I WAS A BIT MESSY AND GOT IT PRETTY MUCH EVERYWHERE. OOPSIE! BUT THEN, I NOTICED THE GHOST! HAD RETURNE!!!! THIS TIME IT WAS COMING OUT OF THE PEE I LEFT BEHIND! IT HAD HAUNTED THE ENTIRE FACTORY, SO I HAD NO CHOICE.

THE WHOLE FACTORY, UP IN FLAMES. IT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO.

THEN I HAD SOME PASTA AND LAY DOWN IN THE GRASS. I LOOK UP AND SEE BIG PUFFY WHITE THINGS IN THE SKY.

no.

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Credited to Thojw 

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