My wife is losing it and I think it’s my fault: Difference between revisions
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In all my 15 years of marriage, I never thought I'd be in this situation. |
In all my 15 years of marriage, I never thought I'd be in this situation. I'm hiding under my couch, praying it doesn't find me, even though my phone has a really bright screen. I know it's an emergency, and I probably shouldn't be writing to a bunch of sixteen year olds on a goddamn social media website, but I make comically poor decisions. |
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It all started about two weeks ago. Me and my seggsy wife were out on a walk when I noticed something. A flower, growing out of her foot. I told her about it, but she laughed it off and made a meme reference because |
It all started about two weeks ago. Me and my seggsy wife were out on a walk when I noticed something. A flower, growing out of her foot. I told her about it, but she laughed it off and made a meme reference because she's quirky and not like the other wives. I laughed too, and we continued on our walk. |
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The story |
The story didn't end there, however. My seksy wife who totally exists started to misplace things, even essentials like potato mashers and gravy boats. When I asked her about her carelessness, she shrugged it off, and then sang a little song or something, I don't know how women behave. Nevertheless, I didn't worry about it much. |
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Things only got worse from there. She eventually stopped getting out of bed, and all she did was sing. I had to order takeout all by myself which is such a pain, and her songs sucked major ass. But, she was still my smokine hotte wife, who is not a fantasy I play in my head as I fall asleep, and I put up with it because |
Things only got worse from there. She eventually stopped getting out of bed, and all she did was sing. I had to order takeout all by myself which is such a pain, and her songs sucked major ass. But, she was still my smokine hotte wife, who is not a fantasy I play in my head as I fall asleep, and I put up with it because I'm a Nice Guy. (Ladies please take note.) |
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One day I woke up, and saw a massive thing of leaves and flowers on my bed. I screamed in a manly way, and pushed it off the bed. Then I realized it was my wife! She started singing a really creepy song. With chills running down my back, I realized my wife |
One day I woke up, and saw a massive thing of leaves and flowers on my bed. I screamed in a manly way, and pushed it off the bed. Then I realized it was my wife! She started singing a really creepy song. With chills running down my back, I realized my wife wasn't the male fantasy I created, but rather a forest nymph! I started crying and shaking vigorously, which is a normal reaction to scary things. I ran under the couch, and that's where it ends. Please help me she isn't a good sing- |
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{{by|CrazyZebra14}} |
{{by|CrazyZebra14}} |