Please Don't Walk in the Summer Sun

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  NSFW WARNING

This page is not safe for work or school. The content of this story is not suitable for some audiences, and may be inappropriate to view in some situations.
...Or in all situations, at any time, any place, and by any audience for that matter.

So my kids couldn't even walk half a mile in the baking sun. I think you can see where this is going. So we had to take shelter in an air conditioned bus for a couple of days till we recover.

Manny emerged from the bus's bathroom with three men.

"Ted? Again? C'mon man this isn't even funny anymore. Every iteration of this joke has been squeezed for every last dreg of humour. My foreskin is more or less ruined by this point and audience saturation must be near breaking point. But you still just can't walk! Try sleeping during the day and walking at night or something, Jesus Christ dude."

"Yeah I know. Say Manny, how about I satisfy you some other way for a change? We could take up hobbies."

"Sure man."

We played Jenga, twister (which ended badly-you can guess how), Took a sightseeing tour of Wuhan on Manny's bus and he bought us some better sneakers for only one rimjob per pair, and he introduced my kids to his own son, Sonny. We discussed the works of Naoya Shiga, Rumi and Pliny the elder. He told me about his childhood in mexico, how his father had been killed by the cartels for refusing to blow their leader, and he'd sought revenge by making every banger worldwide fellate him.

When that was done though, he just felt empty, and not just in his ballsack. He'd tried to do something that would make people smile instead and thought maybe he could do good at Disneyland. But he'd gone too far along the road of sexual predation by then to ever truly give up, and when he met me, his life had seemed worth living again.

"But now we're stuck in a rut ted. You get stuck in a wacky situation and can't walk out of it, and I do the same thing every time like some clockwork toy. Somedays I don't feel like a real Manny anymore. Not even a little childdy. Just a cheap joke. A cheap whore."

I put my hand on his knee.

"Oh manny, you're so much more than that."

And then, by the side of the hotel pool, in front of our children, mine and his, and his bathroom full of Concubines, we did something we'd never done in all our adventures together before.

We kissed. And it felt like angels dancing.



Credited to scannerofcrap 

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