Epic@~!: Difference between revisions
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Capone Shchlieden Cap-One, famous Jazz musician, was currently going to attend his daughter's wedding. Since she was having a wedding today, he wanted to look good for it. However, he recently got into an epic fight with Danger Man, and he was bruised all over the place. So he wore a cloak.
He entered the church were he immediately bumped into his daughter. "Oh, father, thank you for coming to my wedding!
"Charline! Charline!" Capone said in a Mexican accent.
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1 Hour LATER...
Charline had awoken from her spazz out. She saw that Schlieden Jr. came in. He was the flower man and
Suddenly, the main focus of the wedding entered. He was extremely tall (14"3, to be exact,) and he had pulled back, blonde, messy hair, a goatee, had a serious look on his face, and was carrying a bunch of flowers. He smiled confidently, and came across Schlieden Jr. The tiny man was also holding flowers, and let out a guttural growl. The stronger, taller, and just plain more deserving to exist man drop kicked Schlieden Jr. into the stalls, slamming him into a wall and knocking him unconscious.
Charline gasped. "ALDO!" she shouted the
20 minutes LATER...
Schlieden Jr. had, unfortunately, awoken, and everyone was gathered to witness the wedding commence. Charline and Aldo held hands, as a bored looking man with a lion face and an oversized
"Alright, alright, everybody shut your cake holes, the wedding is gonna *yawn* start." Everyone cheered.
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"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" Charline screamed, and slapped herself.
"Charline, stop! Bringing pain upon yourself will not-"
"Shut up! Just shut up! You
Charline continued to beat on her own father, until a voice interrupted.
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"Aunt Picle! I thought you said you had a funeral to attend to! What is your reason for being here?" Charline said.
"Violence is not the answer," Aunt Picle said, ignoring
over the body that fell over the now deceased
"Tenfold? TENFOLD?! NOTHING CAN BE WORSE THAN LOSING YOUR FIANCEE ON A
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"Yes. Haoshoku Haki. The will of the kings. Only one out of a million people have it," another person said.
Picle turned around and back-kicked Charline, waking her up. Picle had shut her up, and she
"How are you gentleman?" the body said, startling everyone.
"Who are you?" Picle said, calmly.
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The force was so powerful that he was able to hold Capone in his grasp, smashing through the church doors and out into Sunday afternoon park. All the wedding attenders, even Picle, expressed wide-eyed shock at the scene before them.Schlieden Jr. ran around in circles, making an elephant sound. The idiot.
Danger man got up and towered over the grounded Capone. "Yo
Danger Man did a cool walk back into the church. "
An ear splitting scream interrupted his killing spree. He turned back, and saw Capone had pulled a microphone from somewhere and did a sonic boom into it.
"Ya foo! That
"Shut your trap, you tasteless piece of flesh," Capone interrupted.
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Danger Man turned again, ready to finish off the attenders. However, a beautiful sound came from where Capone landed. As the smoke cleared, Danger Man realized Capone had gotten up and was playing a magical tune with a saxophone.
Danger Man held his head in pain. "
Capone was caught completely off guard as Danger Man beat on his face, kicked it, and finally headbutted him back into the church. He approached Capone, knife in hand.
"
"S-Schliedon!" He said.
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"So, who is this fool?" Schliedon asked.
"
Schliedon huffed. "Well," he said, "if this guy was knocked out just by one kick, you must be pretty weak, uncle." Schliedon laughed loudly. He then turned his attention to the body of Danger Man, who was picking himself up off the ground. He spat blood, his glasses hanging from a gap in his teeth.
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"YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Danger Man bellowed, quaking the church and all inside it.
A question mark formed on top of
Danger Man then took his glasses off his mouth, approached Schliedon, and stuffed the glasses in his face. Danger Man then started to scream "NO IDIOT HITS DANGER
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Schliedon took the glasses off his face, threw them to the ground, and said "THAT was your revenge? Throwing your
"YO! YOU DONt SPELL MORON WITH AN "E", FOO!!!"
"Coming from you, not to mention you just spelled "
While this rather pointless argument raged on, Capone pondered something. "Wow," Capone said to himself, "his insults are much better than mine."
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"The author just spelled "wrath" wrong... Or maybe it was just to show your stupidity?" Schliedon said.
"Flabbergasting..." Picle said, "
Danger Man charged. "DIEEE!!!!!!"
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Schliedon started to walk away from the downed body of his opponent. "Tsk tsk, uncle," Schliedon said, smiling deviously, "That was your most difficult opponent?"
"Yes, and it makes me feel discouraged that you defeated him so easily." Capone smiled, wiping dust off his sleeves. "At least
"Yup," Schliedon sighed, "
Suddenly, Charline marched towards him. "THAT'S all you can say?! That
exasperated and just sat on a chair while Charline suffered.
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"FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The most violent, loud, and long scream the attenders had ever heard erupted from Danger
Schliedon had another question mark form on his head. Was this Danger Man guy seriously implying that he could beat Schliedon, who had kicked his ass in a manner of 2 and a half seconds?
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"What the hell is that pipsqueak of a weapon gonna do?"
Danger Man fired it at Schliedon, who
The other attenders screamed again. Was she dead?
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"I got it from the black market in Arabia," Danger Man smiled, before another shot fired.
Since Schliedon
But the bullet
"Gran!"
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Danger Man took the time to reload. Schliedon took advantage of this and tried to punch Danger Man in the face, but he had already shot a bullet towards an attender which turned back and hit Schliedon in the back.
Danger Man stomped
Danger Man fired a bullet at Schliedon, and, in the art of poetic justice, the bullet went straight back to Danger
Danger Man cried out in pain.
"You idiot!" said Schliedon, kicking him with both feet at Danger
Danger Man coughed, and looked up to see that Schliedon was standing over him, pointing his gun to the side. Danger Man grabbed the gun out of his hand and fired it point blank again, idiotically, and it hit Danger Man again.
It was official - Danger Man was the dumbest creature ever to walk this planet. He stumbled back, blood pouring from his mouth like a waterfall. "I-
Schliedon spat and approached Danger Man. He kneeled down and checked his pulse. "Glad
The red button of the remote then flashed green and shot a beam of light at
It was a green colored hologram of a man. He was tall like Danger Man, except he wore a purple hat and a squeaky looking purple...dress? Then the controller began to speak, in a robotic woman voice, "C Stumbler. Criminal. Born in 1959. Made fun of in school because of his strange fashion sense. Vowed revenge on all who defied him, and started a gang called the Boppers, originally called the Purple People. It was changed for being too stupid. Joined Danger Man in 1997. Age: 43. Height - 6"5. Weight. 230 lbs. Well, that last bit was the key information. He was a Danger Man affiliate.
Then another voice, which
As if on cue, a huge tank burst through the back of the church. The walls crumbled into dusty debris, some of which landed on wedding attenders, forever trapping them under their mighty grasp.
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"As soon as I pinch this guy," Schliedon said, somehow hearing the comment of his far off uncle.
"I will avenge you...Danger Man..." C Stumbler said. Then he laughed like an insane hyena and pulled out a stethoscope. He put it to Danger
"What did you do? Kill him even further?" Asked Schliedon.
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"I WOULD NEVER KILL MY BROTHER! YOU DESERVE TO BE PLUNGED INTO THE DEEPEST PITS OF EL INFIERNO!" C Stumbler shouted, raising his fist to the heaven. Then he calmed down. "Oh well. Time to die, asesinos!" C Stumbler then waddled back to the tank, hopped in, and saluted the attenders mockingly. He ordered the unseen driver to turn the tank around and they slowly left the building.
Schliedon rubbed his temples in frustration. "Will it end?" He said. Then he snapped his fingers, and a shuriken of light appeared and locked on to the tank. When the shuriken arrived at the tank, and the 20 cow sized war machine blew up, taking C
The wedding attenders looked on in shock at the dust and debris around them. The burning tank stood in front of the carnage, C Stumbler no where to be seen but definitely dead.
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