HitLEr.exe: Difference between revisions
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<p class="MsoNormal">''<span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">"Toph,</span>''<span style="font-size:10.5pt; line-height:115%;font-family:"Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">''<span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">I can't take it anymore, I had to get rid of this thing somehow before it was too late, and I was hoping you'd do it for me. I can't do it,
<p class="MsoNormal">''<span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-fareast-language:EN-GB">Please Toph, destroy this Azula-forsaken disc before he comes after you too, it's too late for meh.</span>''<span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family:"Helvetica","sans-serif"; mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language:EN-GB"> </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">ANY wAy, I looked at the disc and it looks like any ordinary computer CD-R floppy disc, except it had black marker on it written "HitLEr .exe", and it was much unlike Stalin or Gaddafi's handwriting, meaning that he must've gotten it from someone else, like a porn shop or eBay. When I saw "HitLEr" on the writing of the CD, I was actually aroused and wanted to play it, since I'm a a a a a a a a a BIG Hitler fan. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I went up to my room and turned on my book and put the disc in and installed the game. When the title screen popped up I noticed that it was the first Hitler game, I was like "Awesome!" Because like I said earlier I liked the classics, yet I
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I remember what the image looked like in that split second before the game cut to turquoise; The sky had darkened then brightened then darkened again but not quite as much as before, the title swastika was cum-soaked and upside down, the FEGEL 1941 was now instead FEGEL 69, and the water had turned white, like semen, except it looked super-ultra-mega-hyper-realistic. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I suddenly saw something and I stopped to see what it was; it was one of the Nazi soldiers lying dead on the ground bleeding (That was when the music started to slow down), Goebbels had a shocked and saddened look on his face that I never saw him have before, so I had him move along, and he kept that worried look on his face. As he kept moving I saw more dead Nazis as Goebbels moved past them looking more and more worried as the music lowers and he moves past more dead Nazis, I was shocked to see how they all died, they looked like somebody killed them in rather sexy ways; a soldier was hanged on a tree with what appeared to be his balls hanging out, one had all four of his limbs torn off and shoved up his anus and worst of all one soldier had his clothes taken off and put back on inside-out. I felt sick to my stomach when I saw this massacre and apparently so did Goebbels. After a few more seconds there were no more Nazis and the music seemed to have stopped, I still kept Goebbels to continue, ‘cause fuck him. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">After a minute passed after the music stopped, Goebbels was running up a wall that
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Suddenly I began to have a growing feel of being back in tha hood as Goebbels walked closer to Hitler to get his attention, I felt that Goebbels was in danger (of rape) and something bad was going to happen. I heard faint static growing louder as Goebbels was but inches away from Slender— I mean Hitler and stopped and stuck his hand out to touch him. That foreboding feeling in my gut was growing stronger and I felt the urge to tell Goebbels to get away from Hitler as the static grew louder. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Suddenly I heard that creepy noise again... that awful, cereal noise... like Rice Crispies after you pour in the milk, right after 1 seconds have passed as I helped Goebbels run through the forest, and then I started seeing flashes of Hitler popping everywhere on the screen, again with those turquoise and pink eyes, whilst screaming a pixelated "FEGELEIN!". </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">The music changed to that
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">THIS time he had the most aroused looking grin on his face, he looked as though he was enjoying the torment he was giving the poor little Minster of Propaganda as he gained up on him. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Suddenly when Goebbels tripped (another cut scene) the music stopped and Hitler vanished. Goebbels laid there and started crying for 15,000 weeks. The scene was rather upsetting to watch and I kind of teared up myself, I was so upset that I nearly cut my wrists and contemplated suicide, poor poor 16 bit Goebbels why!? Why!? What kind of cruel world do we live in!? Everything is just awful! I
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Fanta started to come down those turquoisened eyes of Hitler's as a pedo-grin slowly grew from his face as he looked down at the horrified Minister of Propaganda, I could do nothing but watch and fap. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I was so shocked by what had happened...did Hitler rape Goebbels? No, he couldn't have... He looks like Skeletor, right? Why did Hitler do that to him? </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I shook the shock off as I was brought back to the character select, the save file that had Goebbels was different; Goebbels was no longer in the box itself but in the TV screen itself, which was flickering with that multi-colour static, Goebbels' expression scared me and I committed suicide but was brought back by the Dragon Balls to continue this game and this god-awful story, his eyes were blue and filled with peanuts, his yellow uniform was now a cum-stained white and he had an expression of drunkenness on his face, which
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">The laugh came again and the screen cut to orange again and stayed there for another 10 nanoseconds, this time the level said "FEGELEIN!! FEGELEIN! FEGELEIN!" </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I was really freaked out by now, I couldn't really tell if this was a porno, or a hentai, or some kind of creepypasta game... or anything really. But despite my fear of what happened next, I kept playing, ‘cause
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">The next level looked much different, it had the ground of the Crap Brian Zone, but the sky background looked like the main menu; it had the dark yellowish cloudy sky. But it was the music that creeped me out the most: It sounded like
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I feel like
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">He ran down the bent, straight pathway in this colourful, monochrome level, and as he did the screen started to flicker magenta static a couple times and then that maddening fart from Hitler and The Fart Fuhrer came again, even though this is the first time
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Then after a few seconds of running I notice several jizz stains on the metallic ground, I felt a growing sense of fear and arousal again thinking something horribly sexy is going to happen to me and Fegelein. He looked nauseated walking down this jizz-stained road, but I still kept him going, ‘cause fuck him. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Okay, I am having the weirdest case of deja vu right now. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Suddenly as Fegelein ran, Hitler appeared right in front of him with those turquoise and pink eyes and then multi-coloured static appeared again, when the static vanished showing nothing but brown screen with text saying "SOrRy aBOuT tHiS, bUT mY CaPS LoCK kEY iS BuStED sO I
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Anyway brown static came again and then I was back to the level, Fegelein looked like he was panicking, and Hitler was nowhere to be found. And this time that high-pitched squealing from the Himmler Hill 1's final boss (The Himm-dawg) was playing. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Was this some kind of boss battle with Hitler? I hoped to God it was, honestly. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Suddenly Hitler appeared right behind Fegelein in what appeared to be a pixelated black
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Another cut scene played as Fegelein fell to his knees and clutched his head sobbing, I felt his agony and cut my wrists, Hitler was actually trolling us BOTH. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">And then in a split second Hitler lunged at Fegelein and the screen went pink with more erotic music that lasted for at least 1 second. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Another text message appeared, "So many bitches to rape with, so little time... would you agree? This is a rhetorical question btw
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">What the hell... Just what is going on? I started to think Hitler was actually trying to talk to me into rape... But I was too scared to think that even though I just stated that I started to think that, okay, you know what?
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I was brought back to the main menu and this time the second file box had Fegelein in the TV screen, his grey uniform had darkened to a greyish grey, his hair was dripping with Fanta and his eyes were orange and filler with Fanta too, and he had a look of sadness on his face. I began to think that those are the actual characters trapped in those TV screens on the save files, but I couldn't believe it... I didn't want to believe it... </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">So I shut off the game and took a break. I took a nap,
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Their cries died out as I then heard Hitler laugh, his laugh... it sounded a lot like the distorted Ozai laugh. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">When he grabbed me and I saw his Cola-filled turquoise and pink-eyed, grinning face, I woke up with a fright and a felt wet. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">After a couple of hours I decided to continue playing the game. I
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I still thought that was wacky, playing as Kim Jong Un, but anyway the level title appeared again and this time it said "...rape?", which I honestly
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">This time I was in some kind of Segway, didn't really look like it was from any of the classic Hitler games, though it has the pixelated style; the floor was shiny and checkered, the walls were a dark greyish purple with animated vibrators and a few dark jizz stains here and there, and there was a dark white curtain hanging above on the top part of the screen. Every 12 seconds or so that purple curtain sways very slowly, but whenever you're playing the game you can barely see it move, so
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Kim Jong Un didn't look entirely nervous like Goebbels and Fegelein did, but he did have a suspicious look on his face as if he was just a bit paranoid. He did a little animation when I just left him standing, he turns his head to the left and then to the right at least twice and then shrugs at me, as if he has no idea where he was or what was going on, I
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Then I stop at a long flight of scrotums leading upward, now I was aroused, even Kim Jong Un seemed turned on, though I pressed onward ‘cause fuck me, him and everyone
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">As I led Kim Jong Un up the down the scrotums, I noticed that the walls have gotten darker and more pinkish; the blue vibrators are now an eerie blue. Then we landed onto another Segway, this one was longer than the last one (or at least it felt like it) and then we headed up another flight of testicles down, this one was much longer, took at least 1 full second. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">That Hitler and Azula were one and the same, a monster, a pure evil, sadistic, all-powerful, nightmarish, demented monster and I was a masochist... and all of his victims, including Goebbels, Fegelein, Kim Jong Un and possibly Stalin and Gaddafi, are just his little sex-toys, and the game is the very gateway into his sex-dungeon of a world and the very bliss his victims are trapped in and I was to be his next sex-slave, yay me. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Suddenly in an actual, complete, no doubt about it, no year, no
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">Then it stopped and showed nothing but pink screen. </span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">... Was a Hitler plushie, smiling with bloodstains under its eyes. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:10.5pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Helvetica","sans-serif";mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";mso-fareast-language: EN-GB">I then threw the doll away and had to buy another one on eBay as the bloodstains from when I cut my wrists
{{video|HitLEr.exe}}
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