Ronald McDonald Has Had Enough: Difference between revisions

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Ronald McDonald is fed up with being a symbol of corporate greed and obesity. He wants to be free. He wants to live in a world without chains on his ankles or fast food on his plate. He was born that way. And now it's time for him to die that way. Ronald has hated McDonald's since the first day they opened their first restaurant as a shitty "community" where local business owners could get a discount on food by employing all of the "undesirable" population. In fact, it was that very first time where he felt the horrible sensation of being pushed around by large men in suits who had a great interest in him. They would fondle him and stuff his face with cheap, shitty food. It was a constant downpour that day and the sky kept on rotating just so he would not feel completely helpless in the face of adversity. Despite of all the abuse and despair, Ronald always kept a smile on his face.
 
McDonald's is coming out with a new heart stopping burger called the McWhopper. Yes, the McWhopper. This burger is McDonald's answer to Burger King's Whopper. It has all the meat from the one burger, but instead of buns, it's built with a massive wall of lettuce. This is a pathetic attempt by McDonald's to be edgy. It's the same shitty cancer causing bullshit that they have been serving since the opening of this retched company. McDonald's has been so successful at making America and other countries an obese laughing stock that the only thing they give a shit about is making more money. Obesity be damned.
 
Ronald McDonald has lived a hateful, unhappy life. He wants to be free from the clutches of these greedy fat bastards that own these restaurants. He wishes he had never been born. Perhaps, if his Mom hadn't insisted on having that unwanted child, he wouldn't be here. Ronald is so far gone that all he thinks about is murder, death, and hate. But, he was always somewhat able to control his desires. Until now.
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