The Duel: Difference between revisions
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John was in |
John was in |
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his |
his uncle's house. He lived far away from the city, on some isolated farm. He |
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was an old and wise man, but was not fragile. He was as strong as a man in his |
was an old and wise man, but was not fragile. He was as strong as a man in his |
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twenties and knew how to throw a punch. |
twenties and knew how to throw a punch. John's uncle also had an attic. There |
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you found the strangest things: from old paintings, to weird toys and even an |
you found the strangest things: from old paintings, to weird toys and even an |
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old Nintendo 64. John was staying with his uncle and decided to go to the attic |
old Nintendo 64. John was staying with his uncle and decided to go to the attic |
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and look through his |
and look through his uncle's stuff. The old man said: ‘'Some things there are |
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buried deeply. It may be wise to let that be, John. |
buried deeply. It may be wise to let that be, John.'' John waved him away and |
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made his way upstairs. The stairs were old and squeaky, the attic filthy. John |
made his way upstairs. The stairs were old and squeaky, the attic filthy. John |
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tried to search for a light button, but |
tried to search for a light button, but couldn't seem to find one. |
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Nevertheless. |
Nevertheless. He'd just search some old crap and go downstairs, dinner must be |
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ready in twenty minutes or something anyway. He decided to first look into the |
ready in twenty minutes or something anyway. He decided to first look into the |
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box in front of him, which he did. The insides however were surprising: the |
box in front of him, which he did. The insides however were surprising: the |
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of the box. It felt sticky and weird, but he thought it was kinda cute. He |
of the box. It felt sticky and weird, but he thought it was kinda cute. He |
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proceeded to take it with him downstairs, to ask his uncle about the doll. John |
proceeded to take it with him downstairs, to ask his uncle about the doll. John |
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opened the door. |
opened the door. ‘'Look what I fou-‘' He didn't came further than that, for his |
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uncle collapsed right there, on the floor. John screamed. |
uncle collapsed right there, on the floor. John screamed. ‘'Uncle? … Uncle!'' |
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No response. Blood started streaming from every hole of his |
No response. Blood started streaming from every hole of his uncle's body (Yes, |
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even from that one. I know what |
even from that one. I know what you're thinking. Pervert.) John started crying. |
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Why did his uncle die? What even happened? He decided to put it all together. |
Why did his uncle die? What even happened? He decided to put it all together. |
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First he found the doll, then he went downstairs, he showed the doll, and… The |
First he found the doll, then he went downstairs, he showed the doll, and… The |
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doll! Where was that little octopus? There was no sign of him in the room, |
doll! Where was that little octopus? There was no sign of him in the room, |
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other than a slimy trail leading upstairs. John |
other than a slimy trail leading upstairs. John wasn't sure what to do, I mean, |
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where could that little octopus have gone? He also |
where could that little octopus have gone? He also couldn't leave the farm, he |
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didn't have a driver's license, and now, you can't drive without one, right? |
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John walked up the stairs. The squeaking sounded even worse than before. Did I |
John walked up the stairs. The squeaking sounded even worse than before. Did I |
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mention his uncle had a medieval weapon arsenal? Well, he has one. |
mention his uncle had a medieval weapon arsenal? Well, he has one. You're not |
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okay with that? Well, |
okay with that? Well, I'm the fucking writer of this motherfucking story so I |
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can do what the fuck ever I wanna do okay? You wanna fucking fight? Come at me |
can do what the fuck ever I wanna do okay? You wanna fucking fight? Come at me |
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mate! |
mate! I'll whoop your ass! Oh wait, I was writing a story. Where the fuck was I |
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again… Oh yeah! John was now on the second floor. He walked to the medieval |
again… Oh yeah! John was now on the second floor. He walked to the medieval |
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weapon arsenal, and grabbed an ancient longsword. |
weapon arsenal, and grabbed an ancient longsword. He'd slay this beast, |
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otherwise his name |
otherwise his name wasn't LORD JONATHAN III OF HOUSE GRIFFITH, now was it? |
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Wait, it |
Wait, it wasn't? Just John? K den. John. His spider senses were tickling… He |
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knew were the creature was hiding. You know what? I |
knew were the creature was hiding. You know what? I don't wanna fucking do this |
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anymore. |
anymore. Let's just skip to the duel because this shit is getting motherfucking |
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boring. BOOM TIMESKIP (Attack on Titan style baby). He and the monster stood |
boring. BOOM TIMESKIP (Attack on Titan style baby). He and the monster stood |
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face to face. The giant octopus spoke. |
face to face. The giant octopus spoke. ‘'Joooooooooohn… Weeeeeeee will |
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dueeeeeel…. |
dueeeeeel….'' John responded: ‘'K den.'' So they stood back to back, and set |
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ten steps both. Wait… |
ten steps both. Wait… That's only with guns, isn't it? Nah, screw it. Then, |
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with a mighty roar, John attacked. His battle cry scared the beast so much, |
with a mighty roar, John attacked. His battle cry scared the beast so much, |
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that it let out a fart. But this was not a regular fart. See, the monster had |
that it let out a fart. But this was not a regular fart. See, the monster had |
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eaten TACO BELL last night! So, the room, and John, was covered in diarrhea. |
eaten TACO BELL last night! So, the room, and John, was covered in diarrhea. |
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But he did not give up. With a slash of his sword that could kill a giant John |
But he did not give up. With a slash of his sword that could kill a giant John |
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killed the creature, blood spurting everywhere. The |
killed the creature, blood spurting everywhere. The creature's eyes turned |
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realistic and blood-red, not his old button eyes. The |
realistic and blood-red, not his old button eyes. The octopus' final words |
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were: |
were: ‘'I should noooooooooot have eeeeeeeaten that Loaded Griiiiiiilleeeeeer |
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Menu……'' It then vanished, back to the Underworld where it came from. |
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John sat in |
John sat in |
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his room. In his hand he had a few shrooms. He said: |
his room. In his hand he had a few shrooms. He said: ‘'Oh man, I'm so fucking |
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high right now, I |
high right now, I don't even know where I am…..'' |
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[[Category:SMOKE WEED ERRYDAY]] |
[[Category:SMOKE WEED ERRYDAY]] |
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[[Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck]] |
[[Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck]] |