Yoshi's Nightmare
I hope I never hear that little green devil say Nintendo ever again, whenever that happens I now get goosebumps or an unnerving chill down my back, why you may ask...I wish you didn't, I was bored, looking around on Google for Yoshi games on my pc. I love Yoshi, he is my favorite Mario character, well Nintendo character in general.
I was lurking around on the internet when my friend had decided to call me, I answered and he sounded worried, I could hear it in his voice. "H-Hello?" he said, I reluctantly answered with a simply "what's wrong? are you hurt?" ya know, a friend thing is to ask what is wrong if they sound worried. He said he was playing his N64 when he had found a game, a game he remembered deeply, Yoshi Story. He actually wasn't worried he was overjoyed. He said that he found it while looking for things to sell in their neighborhood yard sale they host every year. He asked if I could come over and relive some nostalgia with him.
Day 1: 6:48 p.m.
On the car over, he had texted me, I opened it. 'NiNtEnDo' it read it also had a sound clip, I opened it up and put in my headphones and listened carefully. It was the Yoshi Story start up sound, however it was brutally garbled and bits and pieces of Yoshi's calm, happy voice just made it trail off. I had no idea what the hell he was trying to pull. so I just went along in the car, watching as house by house slowly wisked by the car window.
When we had arrived over to his house, my mom said she would be by to pick me up tomorrow at 8 a.m., I walked up to his door. He slowly opened it and practically drove me inside, he was so happy to see me, I gave him a fistbump for ol' time sake, I hadn't seen him for years, he had moved away in the 3rd grade and I was never allowed to see him, for some unknown reason, but he recently moved back into our town and we had met up only today, we were happy.
He said the N64 (Nintendo 64) was down in his basement, he said his mother was going to throw it away cause it was "rotting his brain" but how can Mario 64 and Banjo-Kazooie rot a kid's brain? I grew up with Mario and Banjo and nobody told me my brain was rotting away every powerstar or jiggy I got. So we proceed into his basement and turned on the lights, it was VERY dusty and it looked like something out of a movie, but who cares. He sat down crossing his legs and picking up a controller. He slapped the hard concrete floor three times as to motion me over there to sit down. I walked over to him and he happily turned on his one way ticket to nostalgia. Then I heard the same audio clip I had heard in the car the same choppy noise. It sent a slight chill down my back maybe it was the room...no it was that noise
We had started up on a new file and we sang along with the title theme, then he had hit A on the 'Start Game' option, however we were already on the 2nd page (the game plays out like a story book, therefore it says worlds are pages, just if you didn't know) The Hellscape of this world was rather frightening, especially since this was in a friggin' kids game, but he went on saying 'Oh, it's nothing, Nintendo was pretty weird back then,' and he was right, if you have ever seen the DK64 Game Over Movie you now what I am talking about. That shit scared me as a kid. We were playing when we had approached a hole in the ground, it was surrounded by enemies and he hit one on accident, our Yoshi fell into the hole, but instead of the toadies coming down to take our Yoshi away it said in a text box 'Why did you do this, he was our friend, YOU were our friend and now we trust nobody!'
I had quickly pulled out my camera and took a blurry screenshot of this phenomenon afterwards this had scared me into a feeling that I had never been in before a curled up feeling inside my stomach. It was scary seeing his game like this, he had said he was sorry for killing the Yoshi, the game had responded to his voice in a text box again that read 'I don't believe you, YOU have done this to us, now we will allow you to go, turn it off...TURN....IT...OFF!!!!'
We had gone upstairs to get something to eat so we could get off the subject of our little Yoshi's death. he had said that the game had some water damage on it, it was in the basement during a flood before they had moved away back then, and it was brutally possible that what he said was true, the label was ripped in half and little splotches of miscoloring on the cartridge.
He said we better go find out more about this, my friend was full of good visions that day, so I followed him downstairs and we started it back up, we made it through the worlds and bosses making sure to never lose a Yoshi, however every time we did lose a Yoshi the Music got slower and the Yoshi's began to cry and look more and more sad, this was a happy game how could this happen. We had beat the game in record time and all we had left was one lone Yoshi, the Red Yoshi, he had looked horrible, another text box appeared it said 'My friends are gone, Magikoopa and Bowser will dine on them tonight, and it is all thanks to you, and your dumb bitch of a friend!' This had baffled me, I would've taken a screenshot, but my camera was dead after I had taken the first photo. My friend ripped the game out, The screen went black and we heard a faint 'NiNtEnDo' from the game, he told me to come out back, where he had shot up the game with a BB Gun, splitting the game into pieces and saying that Yoshi couldn't hurt us, how could he? He's just a game character...
Day 2: 8:15 a.m.
When I was in the car on my way back home, I had been relieved that the game was gone, and I couldn't believe what had happened, was it a nightmare? Was there really such a dark twist to a cutsy Yoshi game? No...of course not. Maybe someone, his mother probably, edited the game to scare him into never playing games again. However it didn't work for the rest of the night we played Pokemon Stadium 2, Mario 64, Banjo-Kazooie, Mario Kart, and all of our other favorite games, and I was happy to finally be back in the car where the reality of life was a sheet of glass away, I felt my phone vibrate again, it was the same text as last time, and as I put my phone back in my pocket I heard the green fuck say one more phrase, 'NiNtEnDo'...
Credited to Downhill226
Originally uploaded on June 9, 2013
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