I am a banana

It all started one day when I was feeling rather bored. I decided to open up my phone and watch the tube, but that was my first mistake. I scrolled through my subscriptions list, looking for channels I haven't watched recently. Things started to get freeaky when I came upon the U section. Right there was UhOhBro, the hit classic channel by a man of mystery, AKA GREG. I clicked on the channel, already getting giddy with ecxitement. Greg was the most amazing youtuber ever, right up there with Boogie2988 and KILLLER KEEEMSTAR! Upon viewing the mans channel I saw a strange video. Entitled 'Greg.jpg (try not to die)' it sparked a bit of, dare I say, curiosity in me. I watched the video, and it was Gregory talking about his insanity from a certain Mr. Hansen and how Greg was going to ascend to a state of godhood in order to destroy all his adversities. At the end of the video greg told of how to summon him once he is in his 'final form'. I laughed, but something didn't sit right with me about this video, maybe the fact that it had ZERO VIEWS.

Days later I decided to perform the ritual. I went into my bathroom with three bananas and Greg's three books. I turned off the lights and chanted 'we live in a society' three times. Then, I saw a joker guy in the mirror. It was GREG. He grabbed me by the head and pulled me into the mirror. I ended up inside of his basement, along with all the other countless underaged girls. I pleaded with Greg, calling him the things he called himself on twitter.com. But it was to no avail. For days we ate nothing but vegan food. I cried every minute of every day. Then, on day four, he came down to the basement and announced that he was going to begin a ritual. He pointed to me and told me to follow him to the ritual room. I did. It was a small room with green screen walls and a green screen door. There was also a camera, and a banana costume. Greg got behind the camera and told me to put on the banana costume, which I did, fearing for my life. Once I finished, he turned on the camera, and a voice that was not my own came out of my mouth.

"I'm a banana... I'm a banana... I'm a banana... I'm a banana. I'm a banana. I'm a banana. I'm a banana I'm a banana I'm a banana"

Over and over and over and over again for what seemed to be hours, slowly speeding up. Then, a sound that shocked me to my very core.

"LOOK AT ME MOVE!"

I screamed as the ceiling was torn off of the room and above us there was a massive panda. It reached down, grabbed me, and ate me. The moral of this story is if you are an underaged gril, dont summon Greg. OR HE'LL GIT YA!

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