My Dick Is Haunted 8 - Finale
|
NSFW WARNING
This page is not safe for work or school. The content of this story is not suitable for some audiences, and may be inappropriate to view in some situations. |
My last update was so long ago that none of you remember what happened. Plus there were like 8 fucking parts or something. Coincidentally, right after the end of the last part I mysteriously got amnesia.
There I was, standing in front of a girl I'd never seen before, naked, dick in my hand. There was a mysterious, sticky white substance all over her face. I thought maybe it was mayonnaise, so I tasted a little bit of it. It wasn't mayonnaise. Shit was gross.
The woman screamed.
"YOU DIDN'T PISS ON ME! THAT MEANS... YOU'RE A G-G-G-GHOST!!!!
Ruh roh.
"R.A.! COME! I SUMMON THEE!"
The R.A. burst through the door. He was dressed in the most beautiful coat of armor I had ever seen. It shined like the sun on a really sunny day.
Also there was a bald guy with him.
"FEAR NOT, SHELLY!" spoke the R.A. "I HAVE HEARD YOUR CRIES FOR HELP! I KNOW THE NAKED MAN YOU ARE WITH IS NONE OTHER THAN A G-G-G-GHOST!!!!!!! BUT I HAVE BROUGHT YOUR SAVIOR. HE IS A DESTROYER OF GHOSTS."
"Who is this Son of a Shepherd who stands beside you?" asked Shelly.
"He is a destroyer of ghosts. He is known as The Ghost Face Killer. He comes from an ancient tribe of bald men who are neither alive nor dead. They are known as the Wu Tang Clan. And the stories of old say Wu Tang Clan is not to be trifled with."
Shelly's curiosity was piqued. "How do you slay ghosts, you man whose skin is like the darkest night?"
"I KILL EM WITH THE RHYMES I SPIT"
"I do not understand what you mean-"
"SHUT UP BITCH LEMME DO MY THANG. TIME TO ICE THIS GHOST-ASS MUHKUCKA"
I was more confused than a pigeon doing the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle. I was also hella spooked.
The man of the night began to speak an evil incantation that I assumed was meant to ward off evil spirits.
"I SLAY DEM GHOSTS LIKE I SLAY MCs"
"AIN'T NO MOTHERFUCKER BE AS REAL AS ME"
"I'M SLAYIN' DEM GHOSTS WITH THE SHIT THAT I SPIT"
"MAKIN' HIT AFTER HIT - FUCKERS KNOW I'M LEGIT"
"NOW BE GONE, SPOOKY BITCH- I'M SO FUCKIN' RICH"
"I WEAR GUCCI, YOU WEAR ABERCROMBIE AND FITCH!"
A ghostly choir applauded his incantation.
Yet I did not die. The night man was surprised.
"MOTHERFUCEKR WHY YOU AIN'T DEAD I SPIT DAT INCANTATION OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD AND I'M ALWAYS MAKIN BREAD, IF YO ASS WEREN'T A GHOST I'D FILL YOU UP WITH LEAD"
Then something happened.
All of a sudden, I became one with the greatest incantation spitter of all time - Shaggy 2 Dope from ICP. I spoke his words.
"BITCH YOU DON'T KILL GHOSTS. I KILL GHOST KILLAS"
"HATERS HATE MY INCANTATIONS CUZ MY SKIN IS VANILLA"
"BUT I'M ONE WITH THIS GHOST - AND NOW YOUR ASS IS TOAST"
"TIME FOR YOU TO DIE - YOU'RE A CHICKEN I WILL ROAST."
The Ghost Face Killer vanished.
I had defeated the one they said could never be defeated.
I don't remember anything before I didn't piss on Shelly's face when I was supposed to, but there is one thing I now know.
I am The Undefeated. I am The Unstoppable. And I had some kind of freaky Vulcan mind meld with Shaggy 2 Dope.
And I am Ghost King.
Fin
< Previous | Next >
| Comments • 0 |
Loading comments...
|
