Sherlock Bones Rides Again
Doubtless there were some grumblings about a recent story flagrantly featuring toryisation of demons, so in the interest of balance Sherlock Bones and Wishbone came out of retirement to kick the shit out of Keir Starmer for being pointless and boring and having no values at all for a man of principle. When that was done they realised it was still pretty boring, so they went to kick the shit out of Jeremy Corbyn too. They found him on his allotment.
"Corbyn, You've let us all down by saying we shouldn't support Ukraine. Want to do this Marquess of Queensbury style?"
"Look, can't we do this another time? I've got a fresh crop of marrows coming through."
They looked down to see it wasn't normal marrow he was growing, but bone marrow! Sure enough, a gang of six skeletels burst from the earth, and as everyone should know, Skeletels are coarse sex fiends, the arch enemies of gentlemanly Skeletons! Wishbone attempted to tackle the undead Hoard while Bones got on with trying to beat the shit out of Corbyn, only to find Alex Salmond had pulled up with a Russia today bus to take him to safety! Like any good Hamas supporters, the two of them had also packed the bus with schoolchildren taped to suicide vests to stop the skeleton crimefighters blowing up the whole bus! But Bones was six steps ahead of them. He used his peerless deductive reasoning to work out that since he'd died in the last story and was still here, continuity wasn't too important anyway and he laced the Bus's Petrol tank with milk to cause it to explode, and would spend time assembling the dead children as Skeleton children later.
The Skeletels, despite having poor manners when trying to procreate, recognised a daring move when they saw one and accepted defeat like good sports.
"Dashing well played old chum. This won't stop me from fucking your dear old nan senseless when I pick her up from the bingo, but on this occasion we take our proverbial hats off to you Bones."
With that, the Skeletels returned to the earth to resume their conflict against Skeletonkind another day.
Credited to scannerofcrap
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